Two Sides of the Same Coin

Part of my journey out of a contraceptive mentality also involves the flip side of contraception; forced reproduction, commonly known as IVF. (In-Vitro Fertilization literally means "in glass" fertilization). Many people do not even realize that contraception and IVF are just two sides of the same coin. One is sex without babies, the other is babies without sex. And more and more in our Western culture, contraception is leading to IVF. That is not a surprise. The mentalities for both are very similar.

I was about seven when the first successful "test-tube baby" hit the news. I don't know if I can begin to tell you what a seven-year-old imagines when hearing that headline. For the life of me I could not figure out how that baby could develop in a little tiny test-tube. (The whole transfer to the womb was completely lost on me. I heard test-tube and that is what I believed.) The other weirdness which I have since discovered was actually the wisdom of a child was how empty the mother must have felt to not have the conception occur inside of her.

The idea of conception in a dish was very sad to my seven-year-old mind. In my contraceptive journey, I nearly lost that wisdom. During that time I thought that IVF was such a blessing and gift. I had in my mind that a means to an end was fine as long as I got the ends I wanted. Contraception and IVF break the connection that our bodies intuitively know. During my contracepting days, I know I conceived and miscarried. But I didn't know it at the time. Contraception is a lie to our body and our body begins to believe it. Once I began to leave contraception behind, I knew the precise moment each of my children were conceived. My body told me, and I listened.

It is the same thing with IVF. It is a lie to the body. The female body begins changing at the very moment of conception. IVF denies the mother that first vital week. IVF is a similar shock to the system like contraception. Many women who cease contraception and try to conceive even note the difference. They note how much more in tune with their bodies they are. Though, I still don't understand why anyone who has been in tune would go back to static. For me, getting in tune was a vital piece of my journey out. Morality aside, you couldn't pay me to go back.

It is so sad to watch couples who contracept for years, only to discover that they have now broken their fertility. IVF looks like an answered prayer. It isn't. It is just more heartache. It breaks the connection between husband and wife. It introduces the "mighty hand of the lab tech" into the marriage. Sex is removed from making babies. They become just another thing you can acquire. Babies of IVF are denied their human dignity to be chosen by natural law, (also know as God's design.) The implanted embryo is chosen based on genetic perfection and strength.

I wouldn't exist if those were God's criteria.